The Headache
I call it “the headache”…not “them”, not “headaches”, but “it”.
It is always there, never ending, constant. I have had this headache for over 20 years, and it is getting worse. Some days the pain is worse than others, but it is never ever gone. I have been to many doctors with various specialties. I have taken numerous drugs and have even had surgery to no avail.
It is difficult to understand, I know. When visiting a pain specialist, I explained to him the nature of the pain. He nodded his head and then asked me “so, when a headache starts are you doing something specific? Do they start in the morning?” Resisting the urge to throw something at him, or run screaming out of the room, I explained once again…this time with tears, it is so frustrating. He wasn’t listening, he didn’t understand. The headache doesn’t “start” it just is. Always.
Difficult to think, often impossible to process. My creativity is impaired, my relationships suffer. Fun is often elusive.
I hate this headache.
So very much.
