When Life Was Simple

My brother and me.
Northfield, Minnesota

The Summer of 1972

In 1972, when I was 7 years old, my family moved to Athens, Greece. The plan was to stay there for a year while dad worked for the airlines. We ended up staying for just the summer, but we’ve treasured the memories of the trip and cherished the opportunity. Someday I want to go back! I haven’t photographed all of the slides from that trip, I have abandoned my slide project until I get a new camera, but here are a few:

My brother, DJ, and I napping in the car.

Our landlord in Athens

Awesome, homemade polyester outfit! Thank you Grandmother!

With mom on the front steps

Driving through the mountains in Switzerland/Yugoslavia

We spent many days right here, at the beach. Mom is in white.

Bill’s Pizza

My brother, DJ, called me yesterday afternoon and said something about the power of songs to bring you back to a time or place. Not in those exact words, but then he challenged me with “The Lion Sleeps Tonight.” I think I began answering before he even finished the question….”Bill’s Pizza!”

It is funny how music can sometimes take you, in an instant,  to a place in your past. Young children, a local pizzeria, a well loved jukebox and the coins, given by mom or dad, to choose songs which invariably always  included “The Lion Sleeps Tonight” each and every visit. The smells, the grease, the family time. It is funny that this song carries the same memories for both of us.

As songs hit the radio, or my iPod, I am often confronted with memories. My high school, this party or that, spending time in my room, driving in my car, or later on, memories of past loves, then playing with Starr as a youngster. I love those connections and memories. More recently, music often takes me to Starr and Sunny together…my memories combined with their high school acivities. Our memories together.  It’s both a blessing and  a curse, I don’t ever want to forget the times we had together, but it is also so very painful to remember them. Life is never simple is it? At Bill’s Pizza it was simple, it was fun. I often wish for a day with that innocence and that simplicity again.

Are there songs that bring you back to a certain place or time? What are they? And where do they take you?

What’s For Dinner?

I am not a gourmet, healthy, all natural, organic, beans and whole wheat type of cook. And since it is just the two of us, or even more recently, just me for dinner, I don’t do much (or anything!) in the way of side dishes. They are just too much work as well as a waste of food. For the things that I do make; I don’t use boxed meals, I like to use real food, fresh garlic and vegetables, and real butter, although sometimes using a canned soup or pasta sauce as an ingredient.

My brother, DJ, has been asking more and more lately “what’s for dinner?” So, I thought I might include a little postscript once in a while about what was for dinner, a link to the recipe if there was one and maybe a thumbs up or down from Starr.

Last night I made my version of Chicken Panini. Starr loved it and told me so repeatedly. I cooked the chicken using this basic recipe Italian Chicken, only instead of pounding out the chicken breasts, I butterflied them, slicing them in half making thinner portions. Putting the cooked chicken in between two slices of bread along with some mozzarella cheese and grilling them until browned and melty on my grill pan as I don’t own a sandwich press, but I did give the sandwich a good and hard press with my spatula! 

A New Years Day Outing

Despite our recent trip to South Dakota, Starr and I were feeling stagnant and bored. We needed to get out of the house!

I suggested the old and reportedly haunted, pioneer graveyard that DJ and I visited a couple months ago. She had been there several times with friends in the middle of the night…the ghost stories are always draw for the teen set…but she always waited in the car. Chicken! A daytime visit was something that she has always wanted to do.

We didn’t find any ghosts, but we did spend quite a bit of time wandering around. Starr enjoyed taking pictures.

We found several pennies placed on the grave markers. Here is an example that I found in Starr’s pictures of one of the headstones. I hadn’t heard of this practice, so I looked it up. Frankly, I’m still not sure, but I did find an interesting discussion about it on a Flickr message board.

A majority of the graves are unmarked. Just a stone, a brick, or a simple cross.

Walking among these markers, it is easy to forget that each one marks the life of a loved one. Whose life may have been long or short, who may have been a baby, a child, a spouse or parent. Just like us. These thoughts lead me back to the question of why. Why? What is the meaning of it all? Life and inevitable death.

Despite these thoughts, it was a good day.

On Being Invisible

We were in South Dakota visiting family for the holidays last week. My parents, my brother and his son, Starr and I are together.

There is abundant wildlife where my folks live. Deer, antelope, wild turkeys and mountain lions. I haven’t seen a mountain lion yet, but the rest are plentiful.

My dad, DJ and I were standing in the dining room at the sliding glass door looking at the group of deer that were wandering near the house. The “conversation” went a little like this:

Dad: How many do you think are out there?

Me: Another one just came up the hill….so there are eight.

Dad: I see two on the left, one on the right. I can’t tell how many are together in the middle.

Me: There are eight deer.

DJ: I see a new one that just came over the hill. (This is the one I previously remarked on…)

Me: Yeah, there are now eight.

Dad: How many do you think are there?

Me: Eight.

DJ: I’m not sure. *starts counting…one, two…*

Me: There are eight.

Dad: They are all grouped together it’s hard to tell how many there are.

Me: Eight.

DJ: I count eight.

Dad: I think there are eight.

Home!

For the last few days, I have longed to be home. It was wonderful visiting the family, I had lots of fun, ate lots of great food, played games, was entertained by my awesome nephew, Racer. My brother is always fun, and my folks were relaxed and comfortable to be around. But I was starting to miss normal. My bed, my kitchen, my personal bathroom, alone time, privacy, loud music, my television shows. You know…home!

We made it home late this afternoon. Tired and worn. Facing the messy house that we left last week. In addition to the unpacking, the laundry, all the cleaning that I knew we had to accomplish, I found an unexpected gift in the garage fridge. Nine frozen and exploded sugary sodas! Coke, Pepsi, Sprite…coating the remaining contents and all of the walls of the refrigerator! I’ve kept pop out there for 7 1/2 years for Starr’s friends to use, in all that time, we have never had anything like this happen.

Argh!

After cleaning to the limits of my patience, I too am coated with sticky coke!

Welcome home! It’s good to be back.

Our Delayed Holiday

Starr and I are visiting my parents today. We are having Christmas Eve tonight and Christmas tomorrow. My brother DJ and his favorite kiddo, Racer are on their way and will join us late this afternoon.

It isn’t always easy to get together on the holiday’s with ex’s, other families and distance to consider. In fact, Starr claims that this is the first time in seven years that we have been able to do it. So…we slide the day over a couple of days to accommodate? Who cares? It doesn’t matter to us!

Growing up, we often had to fit Christmas into dad’s work schedule. As an airline pilot he wasn’t always home at the right time, so instead of celebrating without him, we did it early or late so that the family could be together.

In the meantime, we cook and prep. We look forward to DJ and Racer arriving and spending time together. Take one last trip to the grocery store. Maybe play some cards. Have a glass of wine. Watch the weather, and pray that DJ and Racer stay safe on the road.

**checks the weather report**

**chews fingernails**

First Grade Memories

I was randomly reminded of my first grade teacher this morning. Mrs. Ackerman. I loved Mrs Ackerman, she sweetly put up with me when I would visit her home which was in my neighborhood. This was back in the day when we were allowed to wander the neighborhoods or to go to the corner store by ourselves! We would chat, she would feed me cookies and sometimes we would do a craft or something fun. I am embarrassed now that I took up her time like that, but I really enjoyed visiting her! She was a grandmotherly type with grown children…probably around my age now!!…gah, I hope I don’t seem grandmotherly to anyone! Being a grandmother is one thing…being grandmotherly is another…I am not there yet. My mom isn’t there yet!

 

I was very much the same person then that I am today. Show and Tell was pure unadulterated torture. I would much rather watch others. Observing is good, sharing is hard. I often did my own thing, but only in a personal way. I used to write really really tiny, for no other reason than I wanted to. I tried to fit my printing inside the blue lines on my paper. (um, maybe I was trying to hide there in the lines?) Mrs. Ackerman tried to tell me that I couldn’t do that, and I pointed out that I could…easily. I wasn’t trying to talk back, I just didn’t understand. Then she explained that I mustn’t, shouldn’t…just don’t do it! Ah, okay, I see.

  
It was a real estate sign that said Ackerman that unexpectedly brought these memories flooding back to me as I drove past it while running errands this morning. Funny how random things will do that to you!
  

Coincidentally, Starr’s friend Skye is having a First Grade Christmas party this weekend. The guests are invited to dress as they did for their first grade Christmas. Starr actually has the hair bow I made for her back then, we have been using it as a tree ornament for years, and is planning to wear her hair french braided (parted in the middle and braided back on both sides) which was one of my stock styles for her. They are planning to have craft stations to make holiday ornaments, decorate pine cones, etc. Could be fun, I look forward to the pictures!

I was looking for a photograph of me at about six years old in the pile of slides that I have yet to tackle when I found this:
   

Cute, but I don’t see a date on it anywhere. Mom did write Easter in Beeville, Texas on the back but not the year. I would guess that I was 3 or 4ish? Imprompteau costume? But why?
    

Strangely Beautiful

Spring Came, Rain Fell

Catching up. Thanksgiving.

I have been really absent lately, I’ve been under the weather. My cold has morphed into bronchitis and hasn’t been much fun. Blech. So this post is a little this-and-that.

Starr is home for the holiday break…although she decided to go out of town right away to visit some of her nearby high school–now college–friends who are still in classes through Tuesday, so I haven’t really seen much of her. Less than normal really. Which is good in many ways.

She has decided to quit her job at the Aveda salon, which she loved, but the commute…via me…wasn’t working and she was disengaging from her sorority experience and from college. She will now be able to work more hours at her professor’s assistant job and be more involved with school. Hopefully her grades will improve! The side effect of this is that she won’t need me to drive her back and forth anymore. Good for more reasons than are obvious and sad because I will miss her!

“No worries!” She says. “I will still have laundry on the weekends for you!”

Um, yeah, about that…..I have already started saving quarters for her! I just know that they have laundry facilities in the sorority house!

She received good news last week in that she was named Philanthropy Chair for her sorority. She is both excited and nervous about this. It is the position she wanted, but she doesn’t want to mess it up! I am sure that she will do a great job, as long as there is no laundry involved!

We have planned our Thanksgiving menu, which is the same as always. Starr is resistant to new dishes and has her favorites that she will not give up! Sometimes I wonder how her future husband and family will fit into her idea of how things work!? I think they will just have to conform!

We will be having: Grandmother and Mammaw’s chicken n’ cornbread dressing, homemade yeast rolls, mashed potatoes, Starr’s favorite Gulliver’s corn, Mammaw’s candied sweet potatoes (which are all mine, Starr won’t eat them!) apple pie and ice cream. Since it is just the two of us usually, we get to do what we want! It’s a carb-o-licious feast!

We wish that we lived closer to family, so that we could share the day with them, but we also enjoy spending the day together. Old movies, cooking, food, playing card and/or board games…a day to take a true break from “life” and just be…together.

I am thankful to have a daughter who loves me completely, who gets me, and who loves spending time with me. Thankful to have a good relationship with my brother who I love dearly, and to be Aunt to the most amazing 8 year old EVER! I am thankful for Starr’s siblings and their love. I am thankful for DJT and his friendship…I really don’t know what I would have done without it lately. My parents, for their patience and for everything that they have ever done for me.

I pray for Sunny and her family, during these emotional holidays, as well as each and every day. I send them my love and wish for continued healing. I know they miss her terribly. Which is a gross understatement, words are truly inadequate.

I am thankful to have been Sunny’s friend, to have known her, loved her and been loved by her.

We miss you!  …understatement…